Daily Archives: January 22, 2011

Birthers are stupid

Granted that title is kind of a self-evident truth, but regrettably they’re going to come back into the news. (The situation is more complicated than what I’m about to explain, but this is the story you would get from reading headlines, which is sadly all most people do anymore). Apparently the new Governor of Hawaii opened up Pandora’s Box when he went to look for Obama’s birth certificate and couldn’t find it. The government of Hawaii says it’s buried somewhere in mountains of paperwork and it’s just that they can’t track it down this very minute. I’m sure they’re right and it is just buried in a box somewhere. But I’m sure you know as well as I do that those idiot birthers are going to come back that this is a major conspiracy.
However, while reason, facts, and argument are not going to penetrate the thick skulls of these people I am going to provide you with an argument that will leave them stuttering and sputtering to try and come up with a comeback. So while it won’t lead to them seeing truth, it will allow you to enjoy watching them suffer if you have the misfortune of getting into an argument with one of these idiots.
For a thought experiment let’s say Barrack Obama wasn’t born in the US. Hell let’s say he wasn’t even born in Kenya. Let’s say, for the purposes of this thought experiment that he was born on ….….Mars. Let’s say it was a fact that he was born on Mars. Guess what? He’s still a natural born U.S. citizen. Do you know why? Because his mother was a U.S. citizen and so her son is from birth a U.S. citizen (there’s a legal disclaimer about him needing to touch U.S. soil by a certain date…but we have enough pictures of him growing up in Hawaii and Chicago to have that covered). Barrack could have been born in Hawaii, Kenya, Chicago, the Andromeda galaxy, all make him equally a natural born U.S. citizen because his mother was a U.S. citizen.
Watching a birther try to make a comeback to that is actually kind of funny.

Nonetheless they will eventually still try and comeback with “Why doesn’t he release his birth certificate then?” And the answer will be “Because it keeps idiots like you busy and makes it appear anyone who is opposed to Obama is a crackpot.” When you think about it, not releasing his birth certificate was a genius move of misdirection. Rather than have people pour over legislation or moves of the federal bureaucracy or whatever obsessive compulsive government nuts pour over, he has them focused on something that is utterly irrelevant and not, you know, something that might actually piss off the whole of the American public….like say all of his crappy legislation and executive orders.
I will oppose just about everything Barrack Obama does (unless he actually does make a desperate jump to center-right) but please, birthers, shut up. You’re idiots.

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Filed under Obama, People Are Stupid